Saturday, May 21, 2011

Listening Skills.

15 Fools think their own way is right,
but the wise listen to others.
I just got smacked in the face with reality, thank you God for pointing it out again. He is pretty good at it. Flaws or I guess habits that I know I have, but I can’t seem to shake. Geez, do I need to learn to listen, especially to those that care and are taking the time to sit and help me. I’m always quick to jump the gun and speak, always quick to be somewhat defensive. I need to learn so bad how to stay humble and shut up. It’s so hard because not something I knowingly do, but I tend to catch myself in the process; which consequently is too late already. Ahh, it’s frustrating. I don’t know if it’s a pride issue or a stubborn thing, but I know it’s definitely a problem nevertheless. God, I need You so bad. This is not something I can shake on my own. This is where if I was just that much more Christ-like I could shake. Unfortunately, it’s such a lifelong process. I can only pray this isn’t a lifelong issue. I know and can see how it affects those speaking to me. It’s just so rude and inconsiderate. Lord, break me, break this habit of my own. Dad, just rid me of myself so when I talk it’s You, and when I listen it’s You. Just help me continue to grow to be more Christ-like. Help me be slow to speak. Give me the discipline to read more, the dependency to speak with You more, and the brokenness to just desire and love You more. For I know, this is how to become more like You Jesus.
To those I’ve unfortunately done this to, I’m truly sorry. Shamelessly tell me to be quiet, call me out to listen first. Hopefully in time, I can grow to be a true listener; to not be such a fool, but to be wise in His eyes.
With love,
- Adam

So again want smack in the face, yeah He does it. Sure enough I wrote the above earlier tonight while working at a basketball tournament. I was bored, waiting for the night to finish, so I decided to take the opportunity as a chance to read the Word. So I picked up in Proverbs, and sure enough I read the above verse mention, Proverbs 12:15. I immediately felt the conviction like I said, but God wasn't done talking to me and teaching me tonight. I arrived tonight at my meeting for the Costa Rica trip, and yeah there it is again being reemphasized. It wasn't really the purpose of tonight's session, but a friend made such a valuable point about listening. So vital to take the time to truly just listen; like the verse I mentioned says it's wise to listen to others. Sure enough I'm a fool, unfortunately. Later on tonight, I got chance to truly put in play and practice what I was being taught and shown by Him. So humbling to experience the Lord, just talk to me and then use me for His purpose. It's crazy how "coincidental" things tend to happen sometimes. How every thing just seems to go together, like a true process. You call coincidence, I'll call it His perfect plan. It's amazing what your eyes can be opened to when you take the time to just listen. 

Thank You Father for Your never ending patience with me. I ask You continue Your work in me and through me. Teach me, rebuke me, improve Dad. I love You, I need You. Amen.

so again with love,
- Adam

Monday, May 16, 2011

So long, farewell

"A friend is a hand that is always holding yours, no matter how close or far apart you may be. A friend is someone who is always there and will always, always care. A friend is a feeling of forever in the heart."

Brotherhood is something I've learned to truly cherish. I don't mention names normally on my blog, but today I will. Earlier this week I lost a brother of mine, Jason. Before you freak out, no he didn't pass away or anything like that. This week he moved to Kansas City. So I just wanted to share a little bit. Unfortunately this move came in a time that is selfishly disappointing, but yet so perfectly encouraging. It sucks because over the last few months, he has been one of the friends that has never left my side. He is someone whom I consider like a brother. He is one of the few that truly believes in me; that truly encourages me constantly. He is one of the quickest to call me out and tell me to stop pouting and get up to live to my potential. As much as it stinks that he is gone, it has been one of the greatest encouragement to date in my life. It is a real life representation of Jeremiah 29:11, when the Lord declares that He has a plan for us and our futures; and it's a plan to prosper us not to harm us. This comes to fruition through putting your faith and trust in Him. When you seek Him in prayer, when you depend on Him, when you seek His plan for your life, He answers. It was encouraging to see the whole process of how God worked in Jason's life. The things that happened that seemed like such a disappointment at times, turned out leading and allowing for the present to occur. It was honestly amazing and humbling to witness. I pray I can trust God like so. To trust the plans He has for me, to trust to follow His paths and not mine. I know it is what I want, I know it truly is the desire of my heart to live a life that testifies to His name and glory. Simultaneously, I know how quick I can fall due to my pride and selfishness. This is why I pray I can selflessly follow His call when it comes as Jason did. Thank You my Lord for presenting me an example of the sacrifice if need be necessary to follow You. To surrender fully my ideas and adapt to Your call. Thank you Jason for allow God to use and move you. Dude, I miss you; and that is just the beginning to describe the void left by your departure. I pray that God continues to use you, move you, groom you to what He needs. I pray you continue to have a willing spirit. I know, as you tell me often, that God is going to use you in a mighty way up there. Continue running the good race my brother, and let this all be a great example to others and myself. Keep Him first in all things.

with love as always,
- Adam

"Truly great friends are hard to find, difficult to leave, and impossible to forget"

 "Still I won't say goodbye, won't ever say goodbye. And know that I'll always be your friend."

Thursday, May 5, 2011

Reveries of Flight

Reveries of Flight by Oh, Sleeper

 A sound ahead from distant peaks,

a song that all my brothers sing.
It's just out of reach,
to join i would need the wings the heaven denied me.
Its like your deaf to my voice,
but i've been here for every moment, 
waiting on your call to move.
If you could just make a choice,
I know you would find me wanting only to be close to you.
"You keep denying my lead!
Because i've tried, i've never pulled back my reach, 
and i've stayed and i've died, but you keep looking for me 
where I'm not. I wont be just where you want me to be. 
You've got to believe and just trust that I can be everything"Its like your deaf to my voice
"but i'm not!"but i've been here for every moment 
"and i've fought"waiting on your call to move
"just call to move"if you could just make a choice
"oh i have"i know you would find me wanting 
"I just want..."only to be close to you
"all of you."

If you would just try and let (me) pry all your grips on worries,
I would come alive in your life and let you find the flight you're longing.

I listen to this song and I think of you. My heart longs for you, it's different I promise. It's not cause I'm better or greater. It's not cause I look down on you. It is simply because I love you. It breaks my heart to think as it stands, this life is all we'll have together because we stand far apart eternally speaking. As far as we stand, you're not that far. You're one decision away from standing where I and many others are at. I know where you're at, I was there. It might seem like we were on opposite spectres, but I promise I was there. Where I stood was so close to where you're at. I wish I could I reveal what was revealed to me that night. I'm sorry your heart as grown so cold to Him. I'm sorry that every example you've encountered of what I stand for, has been poorly displayed. I'm sorry people don't talk out of love, and tried to force things down you're throat. I'm sorry for hypocrisy displayed time in and time out. I'm sorry that life hasn't lined up according to plan for you. I'm sorry for your heartaches and heartbreaks. I'm sorry. I am sobbing for you right now. I pray daily for you. I know you think it's pointless. I know you appreciate it, but don't see the point. I know you care not to even hear about my God. But most of all I want you to know, you're not alone. We were all there at one point, some deeper than others. I know for a fact I experienced a lot of where you're at. I know it makes no sense. I know you think you had your encounter with God and that was enough for you to say, forget that. I know everything I stand for seems stupid. It seems like I'm missing out on this world's "love". My friend with every ounce of love in my bones, I tell you, you're missing out. I know the god you know, it's not the God I've encountered. I was skeptical all my life until I decided to take a real chance on God. That is what I'm praying for, that you give it a chance. I pray you would be willing to experience the real God, and everything He is about. I know you think you know about Him, but you have the wrong idea or perception. My Dad is different than what you think. I want you to know, I love you; more importantly He loves you. He wants you to know Him. He constantly is calling for you. He's been there all along never pulling back His reach. He knows this life is tough, and at times it makes no sense. But it's not impossible, with Him. If you'd give Him the time of day, I know you'd see it. If then you could still care less, then okay. But I pray you'd let go the idea of what you think or who you think God is, and just give a chance for the real God to reveal himself to you. I love you, no matter what. I am no greater than you. I just want you to have what I have. I want to see you let go of the facade and be truly happy. Be as real as you say you are. I was there; I longed for it, never knowing or having the answer. Then I realized it was with me all along. This statement is the last thing I'll say and I want you to know I can't possibly put in to words how true it is; and that is the last line from the song. 

If you would just try and let Me pry all your grips on worries, I would come alive in your life and let you find the flight you're longing.

I hope you read this one day, I pray you give it a shot. Regardless, I love you always.
 - Adam

P.S. Quick Challenge:

*We all have people we care about that need to hear, and we can't be afraid to share our thoughts with them. No matter how many times they reject it, be faithful. Just think what if nobody had ever shared with you; where would you be?*

Tuesday, May 3, 2011

Nobody to blame.

How often do we question or complain when something doesn't go our way. That is unfortunately the story of many of our lives. We complain and complain, looking for a reason, an excuse, someone/something to blame. But how about this, how about we take responsibility. I think many of us, including myself, need to start taking more responsibility in our lives. It may mean taking responsibility for our actions, or of those around us that affect us; but we need to take on more responsibility.

Too often we make excuses; I'm tired, I'm not comfortable, I'm too busy, I don't want to, but that person did that, it's not my problem, it's not my fault, etc. None of that matters, we should be leaders and accept more responsibilities for and in our lives. How quick we are to agree that things need to be done, but we don't want to do anything about it. How quick we are to say there needs to be a change, but we aren't willing to endure the steps to change. I think those last two statements explain many of our lives, unfortunately, including mine. Why can't we see the bigger picture, why can't we get it? I'm not sure, my only explanation is an observance of how we don't accept responsibility or accountability. It shouldn't be that way though. If we are to be Christ-like as Christians, then let's be Christ-like.

You see this is something that goes often noticed but yet still unnoticed. Jesus showed the ultimate example of responsibility and accountability through His life, and what He did on the cross for us. Honestly, it wasn't His place to be on that cross. It wasn't His sin, on the contrary He was sinless. It wasn't His price to pay, but He payed it. The only one that had no business doing anything for us, is the one who did everything for us. He saw a need, and through His love met it. We are His children, and He took responsibility for us. He is not responsible for our sins, but as His children, He feels responsible for us. He knew we could never pay the price for sin, He knew we had no way to do so. So He took responsibility and accountability for us upon Himself and made a way. He didn't have to do so, but He did.

Now I ask what if Jesus had the same attitude that most of us have. What if Christ said well that's not my problem. What if He said He was tired or didn't want to do it. What if His mentality for His life was the same that we have for ours. Honestly, I think we'd be in trouble; going up the creek without a paddle. When we really take time to see what He did, we'd see, among many things, that Jesus Christ gave us the best possible demonstration of how to take responsibility and be accountable, even for things that aren't your fault or that you don't want to do.

So let's stop making excuses, let's be responsible and accountable. We all have problems in our lives, whether a sin problem, or any kind of issue; that means problems with yourself, problems with your family, problems with friends, or problems with strangers. The solution to those problems can't be found by living in excuses. Stop blaming your past, your present or others for things. Stop making excuses. Jesus showed us how to take accountability and responsibility; so when we fail to do so, we have nobody to blame but ourselves. But don't get down on yourself, just get up stop blaming, and make it happen.

Monday, May 2, 2011

Mood Rings

Sometimes I think I care too much. It's a weakness of mine, I think. I am way too loving and I feel so much for the people that I care about. It's to the point when they hurt, I hurt. It kills me, I wish I could take every burden off my friends' shoulders; just so I can see them be happy and smile. It's why I like talking through things, communicating with the ones I care for; in hopes maybe getting it off their chest and gaining a new perspective will help. It sucks though when I have no idea what's going on, when I'm as clueless as a kindergarten learning physics. It eats me alive. It stinks right now because I feel alone. I know some of my friends are going through a lot but I don't know how to help. It's not just one but a good few of em, and I can't do anything when they're just not communicating with me. It sucks right now because I feel like I've lost some of my closest friends by their own distancing. It stinks because I'm helpless. It's out of my character to do anything different besides continuing to be faithful, loyal, and true to them. I've been told stop caring, but that's not me. My friends, I love you guys. I adore you guys so dearly. I pray God is with you through your trials. I pray His light shines through the darkness. I pray that while in the midst of a battle, you find hope in the victory that is in Christ and through Christ. I wish I could believe it when you guys tell me that is every thing is okay, when I know it is all in shambles. I wish I could help you; I wish I could hug it out, and make the troubles go away. If it were just that simple, but it is. As much I feel helpless, I'm not. As alone as I feel, I'm not. I may be left in the dark, but I have a light. I might not know or understand what you're going through, but I know someone who does. And I'm doing the only thing one can do, and that's pray. I pray that Christ, who is beyond it all, makes Himself revealed. I pray that the answers you need, be found in Him alone. I pray for peace, comfort, grace, love, and restoration amongst you in your troubles. I might not be sure what is going on in your lives, I might not be sure why you're struggling, or why you guys have secluded yourselves; but I pray that the One who has all answers, dwells amongst you and helps you guys. It stinks not being able to help the ones I care for, but I can rest knowing God is at work.

with love, 
- Adam