Friday, November 12, 2010

Therapy

I consider myself to be in a state of therapy right now. Whoa, wait, what? Yeah, I feel like I'm in therapy everyday. Why? Because everyday I come to more of a realization of where I was and where I am now. And let me tell you it is an amazing, yet humbling experience. Everyday I face the facts of who I was, what I used to do, and people I used to allow to influence me. It's not easy, I can admit that. But I take satisfaction that my former darkness only shines His current light even brighter.

Everyday I try to dig into His word to learn more. Everyday I pray just to talk to Him. I write more now than I think I ever have in the last 2-3 years of college. I do everything possible to express my heart, my mind, and simply get things off my chest simultaneously allowing Him to reform me. To me, that sounds like a basic therapy session. I enjoy everyday that I have. I take joy that He gives me another day of life. This hasn't always been the case. In my past, I was actually a rather lonely unhappy sometimes angry person. Those that know me, might have a hard time believing that. As like my brother used to describe me, I was the "angriest happymeal ever". We used to joke that even when I was angry I was still happy, an obvious play on my nickname Happymeal. So true was this, also true was the fact of how lonely I was inside despite what I showed outside. Despite the fact I was always with friends, always with people I care about, I always felt alone. Not the case anymore. Now I spend hours upon hours alone at parks. I ride my bike all over Miami for almost an entire day. And the best part of all that is I never ever feel alone. So I'll end this with one of my favorite lyrics from the song called "Therapy" by Relient K.


"Loneliness and solitude are two things not to get confused. Because I spend my solitude with You." 
                                                 - Relient K







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